The Science of the "Kindness Muscle"

“Above all, I've discovered that practicing cultivated kindness provides a sense of control in this overwhelmingly chaotic world. It can be very easy to feel overwhelmed and lonely, especially when many things seem beyond our control. Choosing to be intentionally and thoughtfully kind without anticipating anything in return holds great power. Kindness is subtle yet possesses a fierce, unstoppable strength.”

                                                                                                Sara, 22-year-old female 

“For me, it started with a slight bow and a smile. Opening a door for, giving way, bending a bit. An intentional, conscious awareness and appreciation of small acts around me. Without expecting anything in return. I noticed the bright colors of the flowers, the blue sky, and the cool touch of the air. I paused and enjoyed the awe for a few seconds.

Something started to change in me.

I noticed myself in a state of thankfulness. calmness and in the present.”

                                                                                               Rama, 33-year- old male

“It was not so easy in the beginning. But the magic began gradually. Like a meditative act, I guarded my thoughts, allowing only the kind ones, the complimentary ones. It was as if I was holding a sieve in my hand, allowing only the thoughts that made my heart feel happy and good. Those thoughts were kind and appreciative. Over time, I noticed a change as my state grew more compassionate, and I became happy and calm. I smiled more and freely offered compliments to others.”

                                                                                              Jennifer, 45-year-old female

“My mother would invariably say kind lines to describe her day's events. She would invariably say how kind the shopkeeper was for explaining everything clearly, how kind her colleague was for offering her a drink, and/or how kind the neighbor was for sending us oranges. She was sowing seeds of kind thinking in all of us. While saying this, her eyes shone, her laughter was warm, oozing warmth.

Looking at her, listening to her, I felt my day stress melting away.  

                                                                                      Jacoby, 19-year-old college sophomore

Kindness is defined as the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate.

When performing acts of kindness towards others, contemplating kind thoughts, or observing others engage in benevolent actions, our brain releases endorphins commonly referred to as the 'feel-good' chemicals. This physiological response naturally elevates our mood and engenders the well-known ‘helper’s high.’ Remarkably, even passive observation of kindness can induce the release of oxytocin, a hormone associated with social bonding. Additionally, such acts and observations may contribute to lowering blood pressure and promoting cardiovascular health. Consequently, in numerous ways, engaging in or witnessing acts of kindness yields tangible benefits.

As mentioned in an earlier blog, although we naturally have kind instincts, it's so valuable to nurture and strengthen them like a muscle. Imagine it as something you can build up—using it strengthens it, but if we don’t use it, it can weaken or fade away. Practicing kindness regularly helps it become a healthy habit, and over time, our kindness muscle can become incredibly strong and resilient. 

What is kindness muscle?

• Neural Growth: MRI studies show that practicing compassion can help strengthen the neural pathways in your brain’s prefrontal cortex and anterior cingulate cortex. These areas are essential for empathy, emotion regulation, and decision-making. It’s inspiring to realize that being kind not only benefits others but also nourishes your own brain.

• Brain Rewiring: Just like working out your muscles makes lifting heavier weights Easier, exercising your muscles makes it easier to lift heavier weights, practicing your "kindness muscle' helps you respond with compassion instead of stress. It’s a wonderful way to build strength in both body and heart.

• Biological Benefits: Kind actions create a sense of "warmth" that helps release oxytocin, a wonderful hormone known as "cardioprotective" because it can lower blood pressure and support heart repair. Doing good for others can have such a positive effect on our hearts!

Key Aspects of the "Kindness Muscle"

Three Essential Strategies for Cultivating an Attitude of Kindness

• Intentionality: Kindness is frequently a deliberate decision rather than merely an innate response, particularly when confronting challenging circumstances or experiencing low emotional states.

• Use it to keep it: Just like how building strength in your muscles takes practice, exercising your kindness muscle makes acting with compassion and empathy feel more natural and effortless over time.

• Small, Consistent Acts: The "muscle" is cultivated through daily actions—such as providing a smile, attentively listening, or holding a door—rather than solely through large, infrequent acts of charity.